Use your magic.

Happy mother day

 

……as I mature emotionally.

Neanderthal man will bed down almost any woman if no one is looking. Women of my generation wanted love more than sex. If sex was in the equations, there was hope for love. If a woman would have your child, she loved you more than a neanderthal could comprehend.

No man can understand the real love between a mother and child. I respect and honor my mother today now more that ever. Anyone who knew my mom would have trouble producing anything bad to say about her. (Except one of Bianca’s best friends she nicked named “cheese”) That aside all mom wanted was your company and time. She would say “tell me all about yourself” and mean it.

One of her favorite people was her grandfather. My namesake. It was fun to watch the dynamics between my mom and her older sister. Very entertaining. The Bantleon’ are loyal and have “duty to the family” instilled into them from birth.

Virginia Bantleon McClure was one of the strongest people I know. I am happy knowing she is finally seeing at 62 maturities coming from my actions. She could chat with Elon Musk and be on the same page. Even challenge him intellectually. She was worldly.

I am lucky to have a mom.

H 

https://bantleon.blogspot.com/2016/05/virginia-bantleon-brier-virginia.html 

 https://bantleon.blogspot.com/2015/05/henry-bantleon.html

Reminiscing the Duffy

 Clark Duffy

I remember meeting Clark the first time at a City of Topeka Economic Development Committee meeting. This was a great committee where the public could come and make a presentation as an individual. I was pitching the College Hill Project. During the presentation, he looked at Gary Price and I could see then I had an advocate.

Over time it was apparent that political affiliation was not a benchmark for friendship, nor should it. Going out to Chapman was great. I have a great picture of Clark by the second largest cottonwood tree in Kansas (I will locate it asap). He sure loved the cattle business and the thought of grass feed beef. Chapman Creek Cattle Company, he was a rancher.

I looked at Clark as a brother. He had a interesting technique of mentoring, it was until years into my sobriety that I understood the points he was making. He cared.

On of his best initiatives Advantage Topeka need a second look. His goal was to keep young people in Topeka. A scholarship program where donors could get some forgiveness for real estate taxes. I loved his tributes to Van Morrison from bench in council chambers, making you know his youthful outlook was present.

I was a bit late grave site. When Susan said Topeka commentary on 10^th street 1 pm, my brain went to the one by McFarland farms. So many good people at the wake. Someone I have known for years extended a hand and said “let’s let the past be the past” upon agreeing and exchanging smiles I realized this is only for the living.

Clark totally enjoyed being an adjunct professor at Washburn. I can only image how he stimulated the young brains and making students think. In honor of Clark & Susan Duffy there is an endowment to create a “Chair” at Washburn to create a degree in government. Clark will live in the hearts of those who knew and loved him.

H

 

 ---------------

Clark R. Duffy, 73, of Topeka, KS, passed away on April 17, 2022. He was born December 22, 1948, in Abilene, KS, the son of Gaylord and Ruth Duffy. He was raised on the family farm near Chapman and attended Wesley, a one-room schoolhouse, where his mother was his teacher through 5th grade there were no easy A's.

Clark graduated from Dickinson County Community High School in 1967, where he was crowned Sports King. Clark's undergraduate work at McPherson College was interrupted by the Vietnam War when he and several of his buddies enlisted in the Marine Corps. Due to Clarks proficiency in typing and penchant for following orders, he served stateside with the Atlantic Fleet HQ, writing orders. After returning home, he resumed his studied at Kansas State University, earning a BS in political science. EMAW!

Clark chose to attend Colorado State University to complete an MA in Political Science. He was drawn to CSU because of their emphasis on environmental studies or, as we all suspect, he just wanted to hit the ski slopes.

After submitting 162 job applications, Clark was hired as an analyst by the Division of the Budget for the State of Kansas under Governors Bennett and Carlin. Clark continued his state service in the Kansas Water Office and the KDHE Bureau of Air and Radiation. He worked in the private sector for six years as Associate Director of the American Petroleum Institute (API).
Clark served eight years on the Topeka City Council representing district 6, including one term as Deputy Mayor. He served as President of the Kansas Chapter of the American Society of Public Administration (ASPA) and the Kansas Association of Conservation and Environmental Education (KACEE). Clark was a recipient of the John K. Strickler Award for Excellence in Conservation and Environmental Education.

Clark enjoyed his retirement by teaching as an Adjunct Professor in the Political Science Department at Washburn University, serving as a consultant with FEMA on nuclear disaster preparedness, and raising grassfed beef, wheat and soybeans on the family farm.

Clark was preceded in death by his parents and is survived by his wife, Susan, and children, Erin (Lance), Brenna (Evy), and Colin, two grandchildren, Henry and Eleanor, and sister, Jody Davis (Don).
In his free time, Clark could be found tuning into Formula 1 at o'dark-thirty or sitting on the 45-yard line at the Bill Snyder Family Stadium. As a true Irishman, Clark celebrated his St. Patrick's Day wedding anniversary donning a kilt, whiskey in hand, and Van Morrison in the background. Clark enjoyed cards; canasta with the family and pitch with his boyhood friends. Clark loved: milk, crosswords, his red corvette, the north 40 gardens, westerns, three squares ALL with beef, creating lists and plans, coaching his children (they did NOT love this), frequent chats with the "helpful" employees at Microsoft, "Head Start" meetings with the kids, watching public TV with Susan and MSNBC.
Clark's recipe for life: be a lifelong learner, travel, be an ethical leader, have passion for what you do, and do what you know.

True to Clarks spirit, a celebration of his life will be on Earth Day, Friday, April 22, 2022, from 4 to 6 p.m. at the Celtic Fox in Downtown Topeka.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Washburn University Foundation Political Science Department, 1729 SW MacVicar Ave, Topeka KS 66614, or the Kansas Association for Conservation and Environmental Education, 2610 Claflin Road, Manhattan KS 66502, or the High Country News, PO Box 1090, Paonia CO 81428. Condolences may be sent online to www.kevinbrennanfamily.com.

 

Published by Kevin Brennan Family Funeral Home on Apr. 19, 2022.

 

 

His last email to me ....

 

clark_duffy clark_duffy <clark_duffy@cox.net>	Mar 17, 2022, 9:49 AM
to me

Henry,

Good to hear from you. I hope you and Bianca are doing well. I think of you every time I see one of your signs.

How times have changed. I took St Patrick's Day serious as well. Now I am babysitting 4 and 2 year-old grandchildren for the day.

We are doing well and so are the kids and grand kids.  Four years ago they gave me 2 1/2 years due to the CMML but I am still doing fine. 

Clark

 

 

I need to find the author ....[facebook friend]

Today I had a day .. 

Sometimes life can be hard & stays hard for longer than you had anticipated, longer than you could have imagined. Yet somehow you are still supposed to make it through. You are still supposed to go through all of your usual motions with a smile on your face and a sparkle in your eye. You are supposed to show up and be yourself and not let anyone else know that you are having a heavy day. You think you need to hide the fact that it feels like the world is on your shoulders.

But the truth is, some days, you may not be able to show up in the way that you hope. Some days you may not be able to fake it, no matter how hard you try. Some days you may not be able to smile a genuine smile that reaches your eyes. Some days your laugh may be a little quieter, and a little less warm and familiar. Some days your eyes will look worn out and your cheeks will be less rosy. And some days you might not have anything to say to anyone because your soul is so quiet and your mind is so tired. And on these days, rather than pushing yourself to the breaking point, rather than trying to force the smile or fake the laugh, I want you to know that it’s okay to just be you. The you that is feeling down. The you that is tired. The you that feels unsure of yourself. The you that feels unfamiliar. I want you to know that it’s okay if you can’t show up fully. It’s okay if you have to cancel plans because you can’t muster up the energy to show up and have a good time. It’s okay if you’re just simply worn out, and having a day. It is totally OKAY.

You don’t have to feel guilty for having a hard day. You don’t have to feel ashamed of the fact that your mind hurts and your body is tired. You don’t have to hide the fact that sometimes life is hard, and sometimes being a human is painful. You owe it to yourself to feel your feelings and to give yourself permission to not be okay for a day. You owe it to yourself to be compassionate and caring, and to be respectful of your own feelings. You owe it to yourself to accept that this is who you are today and tomorrow well, that’s a whole new day.  

Some days are for looking inward and for coping. Some days are simply survival days. 

So please, be a little bit gentler with yourself. Forgive yourself more. Give yourself some grace. Practice self-compassion. And remember that you don’t have to put on a brave face all of the time. You don’t have to be any certain way for you to be loved. Just do what you can with where you are. And always remember … that my friend is enough, it’s more than enough. 

I will look for the Author of this 

until then enjoy this heartfelt post. 

 

H